Funniest Joke I Ever Heard 1960
Journey back to the charm of American humor with jokes and sayings that captured the spirit of a vibrant era. These lighthearted quips from beloved voices offer gentle reminders to embrace joy and resilience in everyday life.
Video Funniest Joke I Ever Heard 1960
Funniest Joke I Ever Heard 1960
1. “We’re gonna spend thirty billion dollars to find out if there’s any intelligent life on Mars. Of course there’s intelligent life on Mars. You can tell by the fact that they’re not spending thirty billion dollars to find out about us!” – Robert Orben
2. “Have you noticed how people are getting more blasé about these space flights all the time? Pretty soon this’ll be known as taking the 9:04 out of Cape Kennedy.” – Robert Orben
3. “I still can’t understand why it should cost a quarter of a billion dollars to send a camera to Mars. What’s it going by—cab?” – Robert Orben
4. “Remember the good old days, when radios plugged in and toothbrushes didn’t?” – Robert Orben
5. “Pretty soon we’re going to be a transistorized, battery-operated, muscleless society. Yesterday a kid showed up for his first Little League game. They gave him a bat and he wanted to know where to plug it in.” – Robert Orben
6. “I can see it now. Hundreds of years from now, archaeologists poking around in the dust of what once was New York—trying to determine what caused the decline and fall of the American civilization. And all they can find is a battery-operated pepper mill.” – Robert Orben
7. “I love the way they keep stressing a low-yield atomic bomb. That’s the military version of being a little bit pregnant.” – Robert Orben
8. “I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up… they have no holidays.” – Henny Youngman
9. “I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous; everyone hasn’t met me yet.” – Rodney Dangerfield
10. “Marriage is a wonderful institution. But who wants to live in an institution?” – Groucho Marx
11. “This is the sixth book I’ve written, which isn’t bad for a guy who’s read only two.” – George Burns
12. “Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is if you fall into an open sewer and die.” – Mel Brooks
13. “A politician is a man who will double cross that bridge when he comes to it.” – Oscar Levant
14. “It’s not that I’m afraid to die; I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” – Woody Allen
15. “The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.” – Marty Feldman
16. “Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who are interested in them? Try a bookstore, under Fiction.” – Over 60s Humor
17. “What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause? Keep busy. If you’re handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you’re done, you will have a place to live.” – Over 60s Humor
18. “Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible… Is that true? Where can it be found? Yes. Matthew 14:92: “And Mary rode Joseph’s ass all the way to Egypt…”” – Over 60s Humor
19. “How can you increase the heart rate of your over-60 year-old husband? Tell him you’re pregnant.” – Over 60s Humor
20. “How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles? Take off your glasses.” – Over 60s Humor
21. “Seriously! What can I do for these crow’s feet and all those wrinkles on my face? Go bra-less. It will usually pull them out.” – Over 60s Humor
22. “Why should 60 plus year old people use valet parking? Valets don’t forget where they park your car.” – Over 60s Humor
23. “Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage? Storing memory is not a problem, Retrieving it is the problem.” – Over 60s Humor
24. “As people age, do they sleep more soundly? Yes, but usually in the afternoon.” – Over 60s Humor
25. “Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses? On their foreheads.” – Over 60s Humor
And just like that, we’ve revisited the spark of 1960’s wit. If one of these lit up your day or stirred a fond memory, share it with a loved one and let the good times roll on.
