Delve into a collection of wise and wonderfully satirical quotes about sex from the great minds of American history. This video presents a full list unforgettable sayings from authors, comedians, and personalities who knew how to capture the funny, confusing, and profound nature of human relationships with a clever turn of phrase. These aren’t just quotes; they are timeless pieces of wisdom that remain as relevant today as they were decades ago.
Let us know in the comments which piece of old American wisdom is your favorite! And don’t forget to like and subscribe for more unique compilations of quotes, proverbs, and quotations.
Video The Best Old American Satirical Wisdom Quotes about Sex You Can’t Miss
The Best Old American Satirical Wisdom Quotes about Sex You Can’t Miss
- “Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation… The other eight are unimportant.”
- Henry Miller, Tropic of Cancer
- “The difference between sex and love is that sex relieves tension and love causes it.”
- Woody Allen, Without Feathers
- “Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go it’s pretty damn good.”
- Woody Allen, Love and Death
- “Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that’s a real treat.”
- Joanne Woodward, quoted in Paul Newman: A Life
- “A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her.”
- Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray
- “I’m not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb… and I also know that I’m not blonde.”
- Dolly Parton, Interview with Barbara Walters
- “The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby.”
- Natalie Wood, quoted in Natalie: A Memoir by Her Sister
- “Love is the answer, but while you’re waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions.”
- Woody Allen, Without Feathers
- “The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing — and then marry him.”
- Cher, quoted in Cher: The Uninhibited Truth
- “A sex symbol becomes a thing. I just hate to be a thing.”
- Marilyn Monroe, Life magazine interview (1962)
- “I’ve been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she’ll kill me.”
- Henny Youngman, Stand-up routine
- “Sex, a great and mysterious motive force in human life, has indisputably been a subject of great curiosity and a source of much confusing conjecture.”
- Dr. Alfred Kinsey, Sexual Behavior in the Human Male
- “There is a place in a man’s heart that will never be filled, a space. It is the wound that sin leaves.”
- Flannery O’Connor, Wise Blood
- “Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.”
- Sharon Stone, quoted in Esquire (1995)
- “The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.”
- Brendan Behan, Brendan Behan’s New York
- “There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz.”
- P. J. O’Rourke, Modern Manners
- “Sex is. There is nothing more to be said about it. Sex is.”
- William Carlos Williams, Paterson
- “If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?”
- Lily Tomlin, The Search for Signs of Intelligent Life in the Universe
- “Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.”
- Joan Crawford, My Way of Life
- “I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back.”
- Zsa Zsa Gabor, quoted in The New York Times
- “The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they’re too old to do it.”
- Shirley MacLaine, My Lucky Stars: A Hollywood Memoir
- “A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished.”
- Zsa Zsa Gabor, quoted in One Lifetime Is Not Enough
- “Sex is a part of nature. I go along with nature.”
- Marilyn Monroe, Life magazine interview (1952)
- “I have a new philosophy. I’m only going to dread one day at a time.”
- Charles M. Schulz, Peanuts
- “Sex is the Tabasco sauce which an otherwise dull dinner is whipped into a piquant delight.”
- H. L. Mencken, A Mencken Chrestomathy
- “Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.”
- Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest
- “Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke.”
- Lynda Barry, One! Hundred! Demons!
- “Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.”
- Richard Jeni, Stand-up routine
- “Sex, in America, is a dirty joke.”
- Lenny Bruce, The Essential Lenny Bruce
- “The main thing is to be desired. And to be desired, you have to be desirable.”
- Mae West, The Wit and Wisdom of Mae West
It seems the more things change, the more they stay the same. A little bit of laughter goes a long way. If you enjoyed this journey through the wit and wisdom of the past, please give this video a thumbs up and subscribe for more. We’d love to read your thoughts in the comments – which quote resonated with you?
